Was Mother of Adam Lanza too Caring and Enabling?

Adam Lanza's Mother kept him isolated from the public as much as possible. That might have contributed to his problems.

If you want some insights into the personality of Newtown shooter, Adam Lanza, you should read this article:



In light of the recent horrible incident in Newtown, Connecticut it's obvious that all the facts are not in yet. We, the general public, are getting bits and pieces of what happened and why and not all of that information is accurate. In today's L.A. Times, the article cited above was published and if it is accurate, it paints a revealing picture of a Mother who maybe cared too much about protecting her son and who, in the end, could not protect her community.

I know that any parent with a child wants, above all to protect them and keep them insulated as long as possible from the bad things in the world. If the information in the article above is correct then it sounds like Adam's mother did what most parents would do. She protected a son with special needs and problems and she pretty much circled the wagons and kept him as much under her care as possible. It's a natural instinct.

It seems like this mother kept her son and her life private and didn't bring in help or seek to acclimate her son to the world in a way that might work for him. She seems to have taken the path that she knew what was best for him and that was to keep him close to her and away from the public.

As Adam is portrayed in this article, it is obvious that the boy needed professional help. He needed it desperately. Did his Mother engage outside help? We don't really know that yet. If not, then she was not helping her son and certainly she did not do her community any favors if she wasn't employing professionals.

When kids are as seriously impacted in social interactions as Adam was, and just "shut down", they need help. As much as a parent thinks that nurturing and love will be enough. It's not.

I feel deep sorrow for the families of the victims in this tragedy but I also feel some sympathy for Adam and his mother. They didn't know how to handle or cope with his disability and isolating it certainly was not the answer. I hope that through all of this people will realize that if a child's behavior is extreme in any way, if you love the child, seek professional help. Tragedies can be prevented in most cases and lives can improve through counseling and therapy.

The call for tighter gun laws is rampant right now but I also hope that this incident teaches parents that the child or person responsible for a tragedy needs preventative attention and help if they are not functioning as most people do. That help might make all the difference in the world.

This post is contributed by a community member. The views expressed in this blog are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of Patch Media Corporation. Everyone is welcome to submit a post to Patch. If you'd like to post a blog, go here to get started.


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